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Gerrit,
Your complaints are well documented. It is a widespread industry practice to
provide limited or even false information in the marketing and packaging of
Wife 1.0. Also there are innumerable vendors of this product who all have
varying degrees of adherence to the standard disclosure practices, and have
been known to use false and misleading advertising, which enhances the
favorable features of the product, while ignoring the product's failings.
This makes it nearly impossible to know what you are installing until it is
too late. As you can attest, Wife 1.0 is most likely to contain a Suite of
Programs which are installed simultaneously, and are nearly impossible to
disable, without serious downside consequences.
Unfortunately Wife 1.0 is most often advertised as Plug and Play, however
the opposite is often the case. Rarely is the potential buyer given
appropriate training in order to make the correct software selection, and is
underqualified to operate the software once it is installed.
It has been shown however that a clever operator can obtain much benefit
from Wife 1.0 and the plugins and extended features, but it generally
requires a steep learning curve and requires adequate support from the Wife
1.0 program itself.
We suggest that you consider installing the addon product Communication 0.1a
beta. This program has been tested and is reputed to be self upgrading once
the proper configuration has been found. Support on this program is limited
and is most likely to not be compatible for your version of Wife. The Wife
1.0 program does contain a file regarding how to implement Communication
0.1a beta, however you must use the Communication program to enable it. To
avoid corrupting your version of Family 1.0 when first running Communication
0.1a beta we strongly suggest that you install and use the Honesty Chip.
This chip accomodates several versions of the Wife Suite of Programs and
most incompatibilities can be resolved through trial and error.
Tech Support
-----Original Message-----
From: Gerrit Jacobsen [mailto:jrt@xxxxxxxxxx]
Sent: Monday, August 30, 1999 3:35 AM
To: david@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx; Omega List
Subject: RE: Off Subject: Humor:Technical Support
David,
> Your problems are probably due to your failure to upgrade to Man 1.0
> with the necessary plugin Husband 1.0. No doubt your are still
> running Boy 40.x
Although I upgraded to husband 1.0 I still found that Wife 1.0 has
undocumented features. It comes with Mother-In-Law Shockwave and
Brother-In-Law Browser. I have been unable to deinstall those
plug-ins.
Furthermore Wife 1.0 must always run in Protected Mode and
then takes charge of the Task Assignment list. This limits the
ability to accomplish anything.
Although I didn't install Mistress 1.1 while running Wife 1.0
I still found that Wife 1.0 locks up the MSMoney files.
Regards,
Gerrit Jacobsen
> Your problems are probably due to your failure to upgrade to Man 1.0 with
> the necessary plugin Husband 1.0. No doubt your are still running Boy 40.x
>
> You will find that Wife 1.0 and Husband 1.0 are only compatible when the
Man
> 1.0 upgrade has been completed. This will remove the outdated software
> Selfishness 6.9 , Slovenliness14.6, Stupidity 365.0, and Rudeness 9.5.
>
> The benefits of this upgrade are many including the elimination of system
> crashes due to interface incompatibilities as both versions of the
software
> are self enhancing once the upgrade has been completed.
>
> An additional piece of software you might consider purchasing is Wisdom.
> There is only one version of this software, although it works best with
> Compassion 2.0 and Patience 4.5.
>
> Tech Support
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: David Olson [mailto:trader7@xxxxxxxxxxxxx]
> Sent: Wednesday, August 25, 1999 10:26 PM
> To: OmegaList
> Subject: Fw: Off Subject: Humor:Technical Support
>
>
> To Technical Support:
>
> Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and
> noticed that the new program began unexpected duplication
> (child) processing that took up a lot of space and valuable
> resources. No mention of this phenomenon was included in
> the product brochure. In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself
> into all other programs and launches during system initial-
> ization, where it monitors all other system activity.
> Applications such as Pokernight 10.3, Drunken Boys Night
> 2.5 and Saturday Football 5.0 no longer run, crashing the
> system whenever selected.
>
>
> I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while
> attempting to run some of my other favorite applications.
> I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but
> un-install does not seem to work on this program.
>
>
> Can you help me, please!!! Otherwise, I'm screwed.
>
>
> Thanks, Joe
>
> -reply from Technical Support----
>
>
> Dear Joe Screwed:
>
> This is a very common problem male operators complain
> about but is mostly due to a primary misconception.
> Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0
> with the idea that Wife 1.0 is merely a "UTILITIES &
> ENTERTAINMENT" program.
>
>
> Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by its creator
> to run everything. It is unlikely you would be able to purge
> Wife 1.0 and still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0. Hidden
> operating files within your Wife 1.0 system would cause
> Girlfriend 7.0 to emulate Wife 1.0, so nothing is gained.
> It is impossible to un-install, delete, or purge the Wife
> 1.0 program files from the system once installed.
>
>
> You can not go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0
> is not designed to do this. Some have tried to install
> Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with more problems
> than the original system. Look in your manual under
> "Warnings - Alimony /Child Support."
>
>
> I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the
> situation. Having Wife 1.0 installed myself, I might
> also suggest you read the entire section regarding
> General Partnership Faults (GPFs). You must assume all
> responsibility for faults and problems that might
> occur, regardless of their cause. The best course of
> action will be to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE. In
> any case avoid excessive use of the "Esc" key because
> ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE
> command before the operating system will return to
> normal. The system will run smoothly as long as you
> take the blame for all the GPFs. Wife 1.0 is a great
> program but has a very high maintenance cost.
>
> Consider buying additional software to improve the
> performance of Wife 1.0. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and
> Chocolates 5.0. Do not, under any circumstances,
> install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This is not
> a supported application for Wife 1.0 and is likely
> to cause irreversible damage to the operating system.
>
>
> Best of luck.
> Tech Support........Bill
>
>
>
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