|
PureBytes Links
Trading Reference Links
|
This is an absolute MUST READ for those who hate those forwarded e-mail
hoaxes. I thought this was an extremely funny way of saying something (or
some things) that needed to be said. (The last paragraph is a scream.)
1. Big companies don't do business via chain letters. Bill Gates is not
giving you $1000, and Disney is not giving you a free vacation. There is no
baby food company issuing class-action checks. Proctor and Gamble is not
part of a satanic cult or scheme, and its logo is not satanic. MTV will not
give you backstage passes if you forward something to the most people. The
Gap is not giving away free clothes. You can relax; there is no need to
pass it on "just in case it's true."
2. There is no kidney theft ring in New Orleans. No one is waking up in
a bathtub full of ice, even if a friend of a friend swears it happened
to their cousin. If you are hell-bent on believing the kidney-theft ring
stories, see:
http://urbanlegends.tqn.com/library/weekly/aa062997.htm
And I quote: "The National Kidney Foundation has repeatedly issued requests
for actual victims of organ thieves to come forward and tell their
stories." None have. That's "none" as in "zero." Not even your friend's
cousin.
3. Neiman Marcus doesn't really sell a $200 cookie recipe. And even if
they do, we all have it. And even if you don't, you can get a copy at:
http://www.bl.net/forwards/cookie.html
Then, if you make the recipe, decide the cookies are that awesome, feel
free to pass the recipe on.
4. If the latest NASA rocket disaster(s) DID contain plutonium that went
to particulate over the eastern seaboard, do you REALLY think
this information would reach the public via an AOL chain letter?
5. There is no "Good Times" virus. In fact, you should never, ever, ever
forward any email containing any virus warning unless you first
confirm that an actual site of an actual company that actually deals with
viruses. Try:
http://www.norton.com
And even then, don't forward it. We don't care. And, you cannot get a virus
from a flashing IM or email; you have to download it....ya know, like, a
FILE!
6. There is no gang initiation plot to murder any motorist who flashes
headlights at another car driving at night without lights.
7. If you still absolutely MUST forward that 10th-generation message from
a friend, at least have the decency to trim the eight miles of
headers showing everyone else who's received it over the last 6 months.
(Think: Cut and Paste) It surely wouldn't hurt to get rid of all
the ">>>" that begin each line either. Besides, if it has gone around that
many times we've probably already seen it.
8. Craig Shergold (or Sherwood, or Sherman, etc.) in England is not dying
of cancer or anything else at this time and would like everyone
to stop sending him their business cards. He apparently is no longer a
"little boy" either.
9. The "Make a Wish" foundation is a real organization doing fine work,
but they have had to establish a special toll free hot line in
response to the large number of Internet hoaxes using their good name and
reputation. It is distracting them from the important work they
do. Also, the American Cancer Society does not give 3 cents for each person
you forward e-mail to. They ask for you to donate money, they don't give it,
as if they could know how many e-mails you sent out...sheesh.
10. If you are one of those insufferable idiots who forwards anything that
"promises" something bad will happen if you "don't,"-- then
something bad will happen to you if I ever meet you in a dark alley.
11. Women really are suffering in Afghanistan, but forwarding an e-mail
won't help their cause in the least. If you want to help, contact your
local legislative representative, or get in touch with Amnesty
International or the Red Cross.
12. KFC really does use real Chickens with feathers and beaks and feet. No,
they really do. Why did they change their name? In this health
conscious world, what was KFC's name? Kentucky FRIED Chicken. FRIED is not
healthy. So with the help of a focus group, they changed the name to KFC.
It's short, doesn't offend dieters and it's easy to remember.
13. Another thing, just because someone said in a message, four generations
back, that "we checked it out and it's legit," does not
actually make it true. There is no bill pending before Congress that will
allow long distance companies to charge you for using the
Internet.
Bottom Line... composing e-mail or posting something on the Net is as easy
as writing on the walls of a public restroom. Don't
automatically believe it until it's proven false...ASSUME it's false,
unless there is proof that it's true.
Now forward this to everyone you know or the program I just put on your
hard drive while you read this E-mail will open up your CD-ROM
and reach out and slap you upside the head!
|