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This is a true story from the WordPerfect helpline. Needless to say
the help desk employee was fired; however,the person is currently suing
the WordPerfect organisation for termination without cause.
This is from the taped conversation leading up to dismissal:
-WordPerfect Technical Desk, may I help you?
> > Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.
-What sort of trouble?
> > Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.
-Went away?
> > They disappeared.
-Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?
> > Nothing.
-Nothing?
> > It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.
-Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?
> > How do I tell?
-Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?
> > What's a sea-prompt?
-Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?
> > There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type!
-Does your monitor have a power indicator?
> > What's a monitor?
-It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a
little light that tells you when it's on?
> > I don't know.
-Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord
goes into it. Can you see that?
> > Yes, I think so.
-Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the
wall.
> >.......Yes, it is.
-When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables
plugged into the back of it, not just one?
> > No.
-Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other
cable.
> >....... Okay, here it is.
-Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of
your computer.
> > I can't reach.
-Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?
> > No.
-Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?
> > Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark.
-Dark?
> > Yes -the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in
from the window.
-Well, turn on the office light then.
> > I can't.
-No? Why not?
> > Because there's a power cut.
-A power... A power cut? Aha, okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still
have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?
> > Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.
-Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it
was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.
> > Really? Is it that bad?
-Yes, I'm afraid it is.
> > Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?
-Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer.
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